Tools, not weapons.

Below is a reminder, a note for self love. And, perhaps, a note of caution.

Dear parents, including myself, please remember that all the wonderful parenting resources you have available to you are merely tools, NOT weapons. I write this for myself after experiencing a righteous bout of mothering doubt, fear and insecurity. With all the well-meaning advice, parenting experts, and an internet full of maybe more ideas then we need, it's easy to fall prey to the fear that you've done it all wrong!

SO, in times of doubt just remember to find this note to help return you to the sweet truth of your own compass. Here is a touch of the healing salve I mixed up for myself. I find it soothing. I hope you do too.

1. Read books in search of your truth, and for inspiration. Do not fall into the trap of feeling that there is any one bible of parenting that overrides the holy grail inscribed in your own heart.

2. Avoid the internet when in an insecure, hormonal or sleep deprived head space. Parenting sites can be just as torturing and unhelpful as WebMD, especially when in a vulnerable state.

3. Be good to yourself. Avoid all forms of emotional cutting.

4. Trust yourself. Trust your heart. Trust your protectiveness, sensitivity, and instincts. Trust your intuition. Trust your baby/child! Trust Mother Nature. Trust the natural development of all things from baby's first [fill in the blank] to the return of your libido. All things in due time. Trust the enfoldment of life. 

When we trust we have no need for weapons to fuel our internal conflicts. When we trust, we can enjoy our babes more, and we can enjoy the bounty of support and inspiration that is available in so many forms.

Be kind with yourself. You are such a beautiful mother and you are doing a kick ass job!